Soooo excited! Just received another two pages from my illustrator! I can't wait to actually finish one of my books and actually say I am a published author! I love the idea of self publishing, because you have control over your own content. You also can just decide your going to run with a concept and start to put it into motion, you don't have to wait around hoping someone will pick it up or approve it. 

Of course with self publishing, you have to pick up more of the workload and more of the cost, but I feel it is the right option for me right now. I'm not saying I would never try and get something published traditionally, but for mow I am happy to just create and see how I go :)

I feel as though I am just finding my feet as a writer, and I have written in a few different genres, Gothic Fantasy/Science Fiction, Murder Mystery, Children's Books and Poetry. I have sat on my manuscripts and ideas for years, and now I am slowly making my way through my boxes of ideas and stories and I can see them coming to life, it's an amazing feeling to to create something and share it with  the world :)

I love the way the world has opened up in the last ten years, E-books are now a thing, a Kindle Reader is now a thing. It has changed the way we create, publish and purchase written media and if it wasn't for this technologically, so many people would not be able to get their work out there!

Who I am as a writer now, is a reflection of all those years of ideas, and I want to release what I have written. Only then will I feel as though I can move onto the new chapter of my life. Moving back to my hometown, soon to be divorced, it feels like a very cathartic and natural thing to do to go over the past, drag out all the old photo albums, all the old stories, and make sense of it all.

It's my way of processing my life's journey so far, and hopefully others will get some joy out of my stories and poetry or at least give them something think about.

Archie the Brave

Been working on my books this morning. I'm so excited becuase I'm finally starting to get some where with something! It feels like for long, it's been just a dream and an idea in my head.

But now, I have more pages on the way from my illustrator, and I'm getting through my stories,and soon they will be ready to be edited.

It actually feels real and I can't believe it's taken me so long to get to this point! I can't wait to see the finished product and know that I am actually living my dream and purpose in life.

Battleship

Battleship

I gave you too much credit for far too long,

I thought that you were different, that you were the one.

But you never saw the tears I cried, or the hurt in my heart when you lied,

The absence of a compliment meant everything I did was wrong.

I heard it all, everyday, nothing was right, if it wasn’t your way…

Now you wonder why I walk away…

You can’t feel my pain, you don’t feel your own emotions,

I held on when I was drowning, now that’s devotion.

I felt myself losing grip, it was you who sunk my battleship,

Now the stories already written,

I’m broken but I forgive you, for my own sake, my own peace mind,

Nothing much ever came from two people being unkind.

Despite my agony, I tried to understand, but you never saw past your own misery.

I never got a word in, you always wanted to be heard, you changed so much,

I don’t recognise you, it’s absurd.

I think that I held onto the image I once had of you,

The laughter in your eyes, when we first fell in love,

To my sad surprise, your kindness died,

And I was left with your shell.

You plunged me into Hell…

You can’t feel my pain; you don’t feel your own emotions,

I held on when I was drowning, now that’s devotion.

I felt myself losing grip, it was you who sunk my battleship,

Now the stories already written,

I’m broken but I forgive you, for my own sake, my own peace of mind,

Nothing much ever came from two people being unkind.

Yes my heart’s worn and weary, my eyes red and teary,

I wanted  so much for you to be, my prince charming,

But I knew maybe this one, is a battle I wasn’t meant to win,

I hope and pray, you find peace one day,

And in my heart you’ll always live.

Let Go

Photo Credit

They say you can’t tell a man you love him,

You have to inspire him to step up to love’s call,

But the inspiration’s all run dry,

And there’s no crack in his wall.

And the paint pots are empty,

The colours have faded long ago,

Your crayons are smashed,

Your brush is dry,

Deaf you are to a lover’s cry,

True love’s patience you’ll never know.

Lingering in the shadows, I feel your presence,

Is it love gone bitter, or pride and ego,

That keep you trapped?

The world is a colourful palette,

Waiting to brighten your vacant soul,

Your shades of grey, they are you, faded,

Keep out the colour, as long as you maintain control.

I held a candle burning bright, I protected the flame,

I cared for it, and keep out the wind,

But it was all in vain.

The moment I turned my back,

You blew it out with vigor,

But now, I’m on the outside,

No longer will I linger.

A ghost of who your were, dances somewhere in my mind,

But even he is fading fast,

A memory lost to time,

Slowly the leaves are returning, to the deaded branches of my mind,

Laughter can be hard again, and its sweet sound is so sublime,

I close my eyes and let in the sunshine in, as it kisses my once cold and vapid face,

I learned to let love let me go,

But hope I forever will embrace.

Me, Myself and I

I love cute illustrations. I've always been fascinated by illustrations since I was a child,and I always thought I'd grow up to be an illustrator. Somewhere along the way though, I discovered my love for the written word, far outweighed my love of art. 

I do however want to study art in some capacity,even if I just borrow a book from the library and or have online drawing lessons, but for now I am content getting my books out and working with illustrators.

You can't do everything,but you can try lol.

I had this drawing down a few years back fro my blog pic, and here's my new one I just got done.

I'm totally loving it and will be updating my blog design down the track, as time, and funds allow.